I Have A Voice: Book Review

When I started writing, my English teacher used to always say, “Find your voice”. I had no clue what he was talking about. I was intrigued. No matter what I would write, he would say, “I still cannot hear your voice.”That is because it is not possible to find one’s voice until one learns to be comfortable in one’s skin. It is only then that one gets over the fear of being original. Yes, it is hard to believe that one can be accepted without being a collage. A collage that has the best of everyone you admire. Somebody’s looks, somebody's luck, somebody's job and someone’s money. The list can go on. You work with what you have and what you learn along the way… every day.Child entertainer Tyler Williams grows up to be many things – an author, a NASCAR driver and country music singer. I Have a Voice is the story of how he discovered what his core self is all about. The book is about how he discovered himself. Like your life and mine, it was not a smooth ride. He had his share of disappointments and found people who help him get back on his feet.Disappointments and failures all play their role in this journey. Tyler’s book has a chapter on learning to engage with conflict.“Giving another person the ability to dictate your identity is a power that that is not theirs to hold. I am the only one responsible for my own identity.”Being connected with his voice allowed him to learn how to operate out of strength instead of weakness. Boldness instead of fear. We have to confront the fears that are muffling our voice. Fears shackle us. To do that an external event often acts as a trigger. Tyler lost his grandmother and a week later broke up with his girlfriend. These two events together seemed to unleash a nudge powerful enough to shore up his courage to go on to discover his strengths and lead his life on his own terms.Leadership Development experts often talk about going through a “crucible experience”. One of the most reliable indicators and predictors of true leadership is an individual’s ability to find meaning in negative events and to learn from even the most trying circumstances. The skills required to conquer adversity and emerge stronger and more committed than ever are the same ones that make for extraordinary leaders.While we get inspired when we hear people who have overcome adversity and failure, we often miss the point that while everyone experiences failure, why does the same experience crush one person and make a role model out of another. That may have something to do with the individual’s power to reflect and make sense of the turmoil.If only Tyler had spent more time telling us about HOW he rearranged his inner world, that would have made this book rise above the ordinary. That is why writing a self-help book is hard.-------------Join me on Twitter @AbhijitBhaduriRead: The Crucibles of Leadership by Warren Bennis